Setting Community-Centric Intentions for the New Year

Never Alone - Part Two

As the new year begins, many of us are filled with hope and a sense of possibility. It’s a time to set goals, to reflect on the year past, and to look forward to what we can achieve in the months ahead.

Each year, as the calendar turns, Jill and I embrace the practice of setting a spiritual intention—one simple word or phrase that will serve as a guide, a theme, and a lens through which we seek to grow spiritually. This annual tradition has become a powerful way for us to center our heart and mind on what God is calling us to focus on in the coming year. It’s not about New Year’s resolutions or self-improvement plans, but about discerning a deeper spiritual focus that aligns our lives with God’s will. These words shape our prayers, our actions, and our reflections, helping us stay anchored in the bigger story of God’s work in our lives and the world (more on setting a spiritual intention).

By embracing this practice, we open ourselves to greater intimacy with Jesus, inviting him to lead us into new depths of understanding and transfiguration. Our framework for spiritual growth is grounded in the Great Commandment to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, strength … love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:37-39) and the Great Commission “Go and make disciples” (Matthew 28:18-20). I’m convinced that these are sequenced in the Gospels intentionally—learn to love God, one another, and self—then go invite people into that communal life of love. This is essentially the mission.

But as many are making plans for personal growth, professional achievements, or fitness goals, or even to grow in love with God, we often neglect the second half of the Great Commandment… to love our neighbor. And this is perhaps the deeper, more profound intention that has the power to transfigure our lives and the lives of others. It is a commitment to cultivate fuller relationships, to strengthen the bonds we already have, and to reach out to those who may be experiencing loneliness or isolation.

Prioritizing Community

Harriet Martineau (1802-1876) “the mother of social science” was a groundbreaking English sociologist and writer, known for her insightful analyses of society, politics, and economics. Martineau understood society as an arrangement of relationships. In every relationship, is the potential for individuals to find a sense of identity and belonging. A recuring theme throughout Martineau’s most influential works, such as “Society in America” (1837), “How to Observe Morals and Manners” (1838), and “Illustrations of Political Economy” (1834–1835), was the healing power of community, through which belonging in social relationships is key to overcoming loneliness.

The epidemic of loneliness and isolation poses significant dangers to both individual well-being and society as a whole. In Never Alone: Sharing the Gift of Community in a Lonely World I summarize emerging research that shows loneliness not only contributes to adverse physical health outcomes, such as heart disease and premature death, but it also fosters feelings of distrust and can drive individuals toward extremist ideologies or even violent groups in search of belonging.

The prevalence of loneliness is rising, with social disconnection affecting people of all ages, particularly adolescents, who are increasingly impacted by the harmful effects of social media. Instead of fostering connection, social media often exacerbates feelings of inadequacy and deepens isolation. This growing societal issue calls for urgent attention, as the lack of meaningful human connection is linked to a broad range of mental health challenges, highlighting the need for inclusive, supportive communities that prioritize real, authentic interaction.

In a world that is increasingly fragmented and disconnected, building and nurturing relationships is not just important—it is essential. Whether it’s with family, friends, coworkers, or neighbors, the connections we build with others offer meaning, support, and a sense of belonging that is foundational to our well-being. Yet, at times, it can be easy to take these relationships for granted or allow them to fade due to busyness or individualistic pursuits.

This year, I’m encouraging our team to set an intention to be more present in the lives of those around us—whether that means spending more time with loved ones or reaching out to people we haven’t connected with in a while. It’s about making a choice to prioritize community and deepen the relationships that matter most.

Intentional Presence

We might start by reflecting on the relationships we already have. Are there ways we can be more intentional in our connections? Could we reach out more regularly, offer a kind word, or share a moment of vulnerability? So often, we think of relationships as something that happen “naturally,” but the truth is that they require care, attention, and effort to grow and thrive.

One of the most profound ways we can strengthen our existing relationships is by practicing the art of presence—by truly being with those around us. In our fast-paced world, we are constantly bombarded by distractions: work, social media, deadlines, and more. But real connection happens when we put down the phone, silence the noise, and engage in deep, authentic conversations. We can make it a point to listen more than we speak, to offer our time without distractions, and to be fully present in the lives of the people who matter most to us.

However, as we invest in those we know, we cannot ignore the deep and growing problem of loneliness and isolation in larger society. Whether it’s a neighbor who lives alone, a coworker who feels disconnected from the team, or a family member who’s struggling with their mental health, there are so many around us who feel unseen and unheard. These are people like us, longing for connection, for a sense of belonging, for someone to acknowledge our humanity and offer a simple act of care.

Going Inward and Downward to Reach Outward

In Never Alone, I draw from Thomas Merton’s description of the three stages of spiritual transformation: awakening from the false self, searching for the true self, and union with God’s self. Merton teaches that the journey toward spiritual wholeness involves moving inward and away from the illusory “false self”—the mask we wear due to sin and isolation—toward the discovery of our authentic self in God. This path is not about withdrawing from the world but recognizing the unity we already share with God and others.

Through contemplation and spiritual discipline, we move closer to this union, which ultimately restores us to our original unity and allows us to love God and others in deeper, more meaningful ways. The practice of solitude, therefore, is not about retreating from relationships but about entering into them more authentically. Merton’s vision emphasizes that Christian spirituality is communal, not privatized, and calls us to live in loving union with God and with all creation.

It is a movement inward, where we rediscover the oneness we already are, so we can move downward, “self-emptying” (kenosis), so we can reach outward in love as our fullest selves, even amidst the struggles and pain of life.

What if each of us committed to reaching out to those who may be experiencing isolation in 2025? Sometimes, the most meaningful acts of connection are the simplest ones—a phone call, an invitation for coffee, or a text to check in. It doesn’t have to be grand, but it does need to be intentional. Look for opportunities to be a source of light in the lives of others, especially those who may be struggling in the darkness of loneliness.

Fresh Expressions—The Gift of Withness

If you are in a position of leadership—whether in your family, workplace, or church—consider ways to foster a culture of inclusion, where people feel supported and valued. This can be as simple as acknowledging someone’s presence, asking about their well-being, or creating space for open conversations about mental health and personal struggles. Sometimes, all it takes is knowing that someone cares enough to notice and reach out. This relational effort is the real “work” of leaders today.

Fresh Expressions of Church are a perfect starting place for healing the isolation in our communities because they focus on creating spaces where people can gather authentically, without pretense or pressure. These gatherings prioritize relationship over ritual and place emphasis on shared experience rather than simply solving problems. When we invite others into simple, meaningful activities—whether it’s sharing a meal, gathering for worship in an unconventional setting, or just spending time together in fellowship—our presence becomes the gift of connection. In these spaces, the emphasis is on being with one another, offering compassion and understanding, not on fixing or changing each other.

As we enter the New Year, this is an ideal time to extend invitations to others, especially those who may feel disconnected or isolated, and offer them the opportunity to experience community in a new way. Fresh expressions provide a pathway for people to encounter God through authentic relationships, where the true nature of Christian love—grounded in being present with one another—can be lived out. Whether at home, in a coffee shop, or at a local community event, these gatherings offer the kind of space where healing and transfiguration can begin, not through dramatic gestures, but through shared moments of connection. This enables us to offer the ultimate gift… withness.

At St. Mark’s, several of our fresh expressions are focused specifically on the ways we can actively engage with individuals who have been marginalized or who are battling addiction, mental health struggles, or other challenges. We believe that true healing happens through communal life—when people are seen, heard, and embraced. This year, I encourage you to reflect on how you can create similar spaces of inclusion and belonging in your own circles. It could be as simple as inviting someone who is often left out to a family gathering or as profound as starting a new incarnational community in the heartbeat of the pain, poverty, or isolation in your community.

Community-Centric Intentions

Just as we seek connection with those we love, we are called to be a presence for those who are marginalized, hurting, or suffering in silence. This year let’s shift our focus from self-centered resolutions to community-centered intentions—intentions to be a source of peace, hope, and connection for others. Let’s intentionally seek out those who are often overlooked, those who may not have anyone checking in on them, and offer them the gift of our time, our attention, and our care.

In the midst of our busy lives, let’s remember that its relationships that bare the true weight of kingdom significance (Luke 16:9). What matters most in the world is what brings us closer to one another, and thereby closer to God. “Church” is most valuable when it gives us the opportunity to walk alongside each other in love and grace. In 2025, let’s commit to building bridges—strengthening the bonds we already have and reaching out to those who need connection the most.

May we embrace the power of community in this new year and find ways to create spaces where all people can belong, feel seen, and experience the love of God through our shared life together. Let’s begin by setting the intention to be the kind of people who, in both word and action, make a difference in the lives of others, helping heal the epidemic of loneliness one relationship at a time.

Here’s to a new year filled with deeper connections, greater compassion, and more inclusive community.

Happy New Year!

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